All the things that truly matter – beauty, love, creativity, joy, inner peace – arise from beyond the mind..
Raw emotions that are brought to the forefront of your mind when you have an attack of herpes can be difficult to admit, and even more difficult to change. The only way you can tackle unwanted emotions is to be honest with yourself about how you feel, and then strive to deal with each emotion in turn.
Embarrassment: You don’t want anyone to see or think that you have it
If you think in terms of evolution, what function does embarrassment actually serve? What does it help you with really? The answer is that it does nothing productive or motivational for us. In actual fact, it only aids us in running away from a situation that is perceived as uncomfortable. There is no danger in this situation. What are you running from exactly? People aren’t going to treat you any differently or be a threat to you or your existence. Even with herpes you can be that happy and productive individual you always are, both at home and at work. Fleeing or avoiding certain situations when you have herpes has no physiological or psychological advantage for anyone.
The best thing to do when you feel embarrassed is consider what positive effects this is having on you and your life. And just remember that the answer is none. Your time is much better served looking at the positive emotions that you should be the proud owner of, with or without herpes.
Paranoia: You think people are staring at you all of the time
Do you really think that people are going to waste their own precious time preoccupied by you? Everyone has to deal with their own self-image, and in doing so most people are worried about how others perceive them which means realistically, most people spend more time worrying about what other people think of them, rather than actually caring about the way other people look or what virus someone else is carrying. If you spend most of your time worrying about the perceptions of others you’ll let your own life pass you by. The most important aspect of your life is you, nobody else.
What you should be doing is focusing on the real things in life, not perceptions, for example; how productive you’re being in life, how much you’re enjoying something, how well you’re doing at school or at work, how many things that people say that are positive to you every day, how much you love your friends and family and how much you know they love you. These things, you can measure. They are what is real in your life.
Discomfort: You feel uncomfortable nearly all of the time
Feeling different with the virus is natural. Discomfort in your own body with a virus such as Herpes, be it type 1 or 2, is common. It’s something that you feel is plaguing you. You want it to go away but the fact of the matter is you have it for life. Or at least until there is a cure found for it. This means that you have to live with how you feel when you have an outbreak, and feeling uncomfortable is just one of these things you have to manage. However, all is not lost. You can do a lot to dramatically reduce the discomfort. Even when you deal with the psychological pain of your herpes appropriately, you’re obviously still left with some physical discomfort. Herpes doesn’t cause a tremendous amount of physical pain but it does cause a significant amount of discomfort. Buying the right creams or medication can be of great help, and trying as many as you can get your hands on can help you out significantly. You just need to try everything available and figure out what works best and most conveniently for you. Just because you have a little bit of physical pain doesn’t mean you have the go ahead to stop living aspects of your life like missing school, calling in sick from work, or even avoiding friends. Pain is a barrier of course, to some extent, but it’s a barrier that makes you a more cautious individual, not an individual that should be succumbing to a little bit of discomfort. Think of the pain some people go through everyday. At least an attack of herpes doesn’t last forever.
Disgust: You feel dirty. You think you and your body is unclean
Self-image, as much as you like to deny it, is an important aspect of your being. The more confident you are in your body, the more likely you are to enjoy life. Herpes can give a normally confident individual a poor self-image, which can be really detrimental to health. This is something that can be dealt with in terms of positive thinking. Of course you’re going to feel low when normally you are so happy and positive about who you are and what you look like. You now feel a little bit unclean and slightly disgusted with yourself. Unfortunately, the virus is here to stay and the more we accept that, the more beneficial it will be to your self-image. There are millions of people with many viruses the world over. These things happen, and it doesn’t mean you should respect yourself any less.
The best thing you can do is to remember the feeling you have when you are at your happiest. Think about who you are, what you look like, why you are pleased with yourself, and write these things down. Try to remember the way it makes you feel. Elated probably. Think about why that should change when you have an attack of herpes. It shouldn’t. You are still that person, and a cold sore or herpes type 2 cannot change that fact.